Wonder how to tell if someone you love has post traumatic stress disorder symptoms? Here are some insights.

He's home safe and you should be happy. You are, except…

He has a faraway look in his eyes, like he is somewhere else. He cannot concentrate and is often distracted. He startles easily and overreacts to things that never bothered him before. He is ever vigilant, always looking around, waiting for the next bad thing to happen. These are post traumatic stress disorder symptoms and they are making your life miserable.

Here are more symptoms:

He stays up late, way late. He flips through TV channels with sound off, surfs the web, plays video games, or just stares into space. His eyelids are sliding shut on him, but the moment you suggest he go to sleep, he sits straight up and nearly yells "no!" When he does come to bed, he tosses and turns. He sleeps lightly, jumping at every little sound. He has nightmares. Bad ones, ones that scare you. He may wake up screaming, or drenched in sweat. Sleep disturbances are one of the most common post traumatic stress disorder symptoms.

He is irritable, chronically angry. Small things frustrate him. His moods change without warning. He is angry one minute, apologetic the next. Then he ignores you. He is withdrawn, then he wants you by his side. Suddenly he wants the whole family around. Then he walks away. He cries, then cusses. You feel like you have emotional whiplash.

You avoid having difficult discussions with him. When he is in a good mood, you want to savor it. You don't want to spoil it with anything negative. And when his mood is foul, no way would you risk making it worse. You rarely make requests, especially if it would require him to interact with other people. You hesitate to make plans with friends because you can't predict his reaction. You keep the kids quiet, or keep them away from him when they are rambunctious. On your way home from work, you worry about what kind of mood he will be in. You are walking on eggshells, not wanting to set him off.

These post traumatic stress disorder symptoms are difficult, but then there are the ones that really break your heart:

He looks through you. You are standing face to face, but he is not there. There is no emotion in the eyes that used to look at you with so much love. There is nothing. Not anger, or hurt. Not regret. Nothing. You may feel his skin beneath your hand, but you know you cannot touch him. And the pain goes straight to your heart. You feel lonely, because you are alone.

He may not be interested in sex at all. Or he may be obsessed with it. Sex may be the only glimmer of feeling he has. It is not making love anymore. It is not what you want or need, but you are glad to have even this because it is the only time he touches you. You know you deserve better, but you accept this because you know it is all he has to give. Even if it feels more like taking, than giving. You hope it means that one day, he will be back, all of him, like before.

If this describes your life, your loved one has post-traumatic stress disorder symptoms and you are going to need help to protect your sanity, facilitate his healing, and save your relationship.