It does not matter if you did or did not see it coming the bottom line is you and your ex girlfriend are no longer in the relationship. It may have been one too many arguments or the two of you felt you needed some space emotionally to explore your feelings and maybe even start dating some new people. Well as far as you are concerned that did not work and you want your ex back now if not sooner.

Now of course you are probably going to have to make some life changes. Let's face it no one is perfect. We all have areas in our lives that could use some improvement. Your ex girlfriend mentioned of few of them to you. Not to be outdone you prepared your own list for her as well. But you don't want to get into a back and forth as to who needs to improve more.

What can help the healing process of the breakup and even start the reuniting of you and your ex is if you have sincerely forgiven them.

Sometimes we say yes we want the love of our life back without seriously thinking about how we have been hurt. When that happens it's like building a new house on the same old shaky ground. It may be okay at first but it won't be long before some of the same old problems resurface.

Therefore be ready to:

1. Forgive Your Ex

By doing so you are accepting them for who she is while wiping the slate clean. You are not holding anything over her which you could use in the future if something does not go your way. You are doing your best to practice unconditional love.

2. Forgive Yourself

Some people never let go. They continue to beat themselves up even after getting their ex back. They vow never to do this, that or the other thing again which puts the whole relationship on eggshells. If you did the best you could and made some mistakes then tell yourself that and then let it go.