The routine is the same every day: you come home from work or from the store, and Earl, your Tibetan Mastiff, comes to greet you. You lavish affection on him for just being there – for celebrating your presence in the room. You have exchanged kisses and hugs, and now you move into the kitchen to cook dinner. While you are cooking, you give him tastes of the food; a sliver of cooked chicken, and a handful of noodles. You smile as he devours them. It is the same as you eat your meal, offering him samples of your dinner under the table. After dinner, you sit on the couch and watch TV after he has pulled you out of the house, and Earl lounges luxuriously on the other half of your giant leather sofa. All is routine in your home.

Except for one day, when Earl won't listen to you when you ask him to come inside; he growls at you when you try to touch his food or toys; he nips at or controls your guests with his behavior. "What happened?" You ask yourself, "Earl used to be such a good dog."

What has happened? Your dog has become the leader of your house, and if you were to ask any reputable dog trainer, this is exactly what happens when we don't act as a strong, confident, leader of our pack. In order to achieve the strength and confidence your dog will respect, most will advocate that we must follow this regiment, and in this order: Exercise, obedience and then you can shower him with love and affection. This formula is based on dog psychology, and if done in the reverse order or without exercise and discipline, the results can be an aggressive alpha dog.

Exercise

Dogs are active animals by nature. They evolved to walk and run long distances in order to obtain their food, protect their territory, find their mates, and live in a pack environment in order to survive. A lack of exercise can mean an abundance of energy, which can express itself in destructive or aggressive behavior. In addition, walking with your dog links him with his pack mentality and will help forge a strong bond between the two of you.

Obedience

Now obedience never means striking or punishing your dog. This simply means setting limits and parameters for your dog to follow and being consistent with reinforcing these rules. Dogs naturally will respect a leader who issues commands in a calm and confident manner and demonstrates clear expectations.

Then Love

Most owners are guilty of being lax with discipline and overindulgent in love and affection. The problem is not love and puppy kisses, but that Earl gets petted, kissed and fussed over for doing nothing. To live with a dog who respects you as his pack leader, only give your dog praise and when they have done something to deserve it. In Dog Land, a good leader is strong and formidable, but actually not loving or affectionate. An overly affectionate leader is quickly dethroned, because they are deemed incapable of protecting and providing for the pack. Indeed dogs live in a world with humans who can't turn this off. The intent of this article is not to suggest you cease giving your dog love, this isn't plausible. However, if done in the correct order, you will ensure Earl respects you and as well loves you. Having the latter without the former means your dog will become aggressive and not obey you.

So to stop Earl's aggression in its place, follow these steps:

• Be consistent with rules. Don't allow for any transgression.

• Give affection after Earl has obeyed you

• One well-known dog trainer advocates that nothing is free. Earl shouldn't get hugs and kisses simple for being cute; he must earn it.

• Do things on your terms, not his. This means for example, that you let him in or out of the house according to your schedule, not when he scratches or barks to go out.

• You come first. As leader, you exit the house first or eat first, etc. Demonstrate this to Earl, and it won't be long before he accepts this arrangement.

By nature, dogs look for and crave leadership. Given that Earl is a pack animal who although he has learned to live with humans, he is still closely linked with his cousins, the wolves, as a result, he won't bemoan being demoted. In fact, he will be a calmer, happier, well-adjusted canine companion. And this is because you have established a secure pack structure for him, and so he will easily adapt to his role as a subordinate.