From time to time Google looks not so much like a search engine – a lifeless tool meant to process users’ queries, – but more like a Terpsichore whose movements make people hold their breath and watch her with awe. Actually, Google has performed its enchanting/inconceivable/troublesome (odd ones out) dance since 2000, but each time it’s something matchless and unpredictable, regarding both the date of upgrade and the results.

Such intriguing issues as technical background, Matt Cutts’ explanations, notorious updates like Jagger and PageRank jumping have been already studied inside out on the Web, so, let’s keep aside mere words and concentrate on another topic: each user knows that dancing is Google’s nature, but has anybody ever wondered what dance does it perform exactly?

Looking through the related forums I classified people’s opinions according to the list of dance style categories.

So, this time Mr G., the honored artist of the World Wide Web scene may be dancing:

• seductive tango. Many webmasters are quite amazed with the results of January update, as after the Google Dance their PageRank got a noble deep-green color, and their ranking looks more tempting:

"One of my blogs had been PR2 for the past 3 years – now it’s up to 5! I feel good, ta-da-dam…"

• well-ordered minuet. Strange enough, but despite all Google’s delays (e.g. in October 2007, as well as October 2005, when PageRank hadn’t been updated for six months or so), some website owners still believe in the systematic character of Google’s movements:

"Google is updating regularly – up and down. From inside sources I’ve learned that the next changes would be made April 14th 2008." Oops.. Seems like they were wrong?..

• chaotic rave. Meanwhile, lots of users don’t see any order in what Google makes on the scene, considering its behavior as strange and intended to mess the minds of webmasters:

"Hey folks, something truly weird is happening with Google. Yesterday my PR went from 0 to 2 – I did expect it because of my links – but several hours later I checked it and saw PR0 again… Anybody knows what’s the hell goin’ on?"

• rapid and breathtaking jig. All spectators are shocked with the crazy rhythm Google has chosen for its performance. Actually, most people don’t like the "mezzo allegro" tempo, giving the preference to "moderato" and "dolce":

"The current update has come too soon, but you never know what to expect from Google."

• meaningless chicken dance. While some webmasters are getting mad about the color of their PR bar, others reject the very idea of its importance, treating the update philosophically:

"Really people, PageRank doesn’t matter in SEO, so don’t be worried about it. Just focus on your SEO."

• other versions. Do you know other dances Google is good at?