There are hundreds of guidelines I could share on how to deal with someone suffering from alcoholism. An alcoholic in our lives can present situations that we are unfamiliar with. How we handle ourselves in the midst of interacting with a problem drinker is the key to enjoying or not enjoying our life.

Let me set the foundation with you first, then I'll give you some solid things to use in this dysfunctional relationship you are involved in.

If you think about it, nothing that you have done up until this point has caused the alcoholic to quit drinking. To take it a step further, nothing that you have tried has caused them to stop acting the way they do. In many instances we beg, argue, demand and try to control everything that they are doing, and nothing works. Am I right or not?

Now, think for a moment of how frustrated, angry, sad and depressed that you may have become as a result of trying to deal with an alcoholic. Do you think that if you had reacted to their behavior differently that you would not be experiencing so many negative emotions? Of course you wouldn't.

With these things in mind, does it stand to reason that if their behaviors have not changed and ours have for the worse that we should learn how to deal with the situation differently? I mean if they refuse to make changes, then that only leaves us holding the power to change our own lives.

So the first step in understanding how to deal with an alcoholic is admitting that you need to change the way you react or respond to everything they are doing. For instance, if they are the type of alcoholic who loves to argue and fight, it takes two people to do this. When we make the decision to NOT participate, then "we" reduce the chances of experiencing negative emotions.

The same principle applies to obsessing over what the problem drinker is doing all of the time. They are going to do what they do no matter what. When "we" start changing our focus and get it off of what they are or are not doing and begin to do things that we enjoy, we will then experience less frustration in our lives. This is called "letting go."

As we begin to realize that we cannot control their behaviors, it becomes easier to let go of many of the things they are doing. As we let go of the things we cannot change and start changing things we can, then we begin to experience more peace and serenity in our lives.

I hope you were not expecting me to tell you how to get the alcoholic to stop drinking. I cannot offer any advice along those lines other than quit enabling. The sooner they suffer the consequences of their choices the quicker they will hit bottom and ask for help.

In review, understand that nothing you have tried has made them quit. Accept that you are the one who needs to start changing the way you interact with them because they are not going to change. Start changing your focus and getting it off of everything they are doing and begin to enjoy your own life again.

Now those are the foundational principles of how to deal with an alcoholic . Like I said earlier, there are hundreds of tips I can share with you. These few that you have received today will be challenging to start with. Just remember to do the best that you can and learn all that you can about how to deal with an alcoholic. The more methods you learn and practice on a daily basis the better "your" life will become.