As some of you may know, I have ADHD. For people who don't know what that is, its a neurological disorder called Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. When people hear thus, they assume its just someone being overly active, annoying at times and fidgeting. However, contrary to popular believer, it doesn't just have those characteristics. It also includes poor time management. For example, if I know that I have somewhere to be at 2 pm, from about 10 am, I won't be able to do anything else, because I'll think that I will be late. It also includes being over sensitive to touch and sounds, being overly emotional at times whether this be anger, sadness, happiness or even just being overly sensitive. Hyper fixating on things; this includes hyper fixating on a certain food, song, artist or movie/show. It can also include eating dosorders because you get so stuck on what you're meant to look like, or feeling hungry all the time, that it actually really affects the way you eat. But you know what, it also means that we're normally quite creative. A lot of people with ADHD will be bloggers, authors, artists, singers, or just do something creative and artsy. We also make amazing friends. We're super loyal and are always up for a good time. We do however get extremely people'd out, and if we make a plan while we're in a good mood and in a people mood, once that plan comes around, its probable that we won't feel like doing it anymore. There's a lot more that in encompasses, but if I tried to include everything about ADHD, this would be a novel.

I never really fully understood what having ADHD meant until I reached my early twenties. I knew I had it when I was a kid, but it was never properly explained to me. Probably because it was never properly explained to me parents or wider family. I was always just deemed as the naughty kid or the annoying girl. Nobody really understood that I didn't understand what was going on in my brain. I could never tune out all the sounds. If I knew then what I know now, I would have used headphones everywhere I went, as I know that would have helped. I was always such a loud kid, because I could never hear what I was saying over the noise. It made me the person everyone tried to avoid. It made me feel like an outcast at school, at home, and later on in life, at work. Sometimes I still feel like an outcast in my own marriage and at my church because of the way my brain works. I'm on medications for it, but sometimes it still feels like a daily struggle. When I was a kid I was constantly told off for being too loud or too excited. It was something that I couldn't help though. When you have ADHD, you don't really have much control over how loud you go. When you hear yourself talk, you sound like you're talking quietly. I never understood why I was being told off, because to me, I was talking quietly. It made me feel like I shouldn't talk.

It's tough being overly-sensitive. Its not just being hyper-sensitive when you're sad or angry. It's when you're happy as well. The process involved in emotional regulation doesn't happen automatically, which results in emotional dysregulation. Things like when we have a big success, it's highly likely that we will feel down for a period of time afterwards. It's also quite normal for people with ADHD to have emotional outbursts, or what other people call tantrums. Not such a nice word for it as it has the conotations as someone who is sulking or acting like a baby. When you have ADHD, you feel emotions so strongly that it feels impossible to contain them. This is where the emotional outbursts come in. Even if you're feeling so happy and elated, its most likely going to eventually turn into feeling so down and depressed that you don't know what to do with yourself. A lot of people get into bed and just try to sleep it off. I've found however, that the best way to combat these moods, is by going to the gym. Exercising releases dopamine that controls your emotions and works them out of your body. This helps with attention and clear thinking. People with ADHD normally have less dopamine than usual in their brain. This is why a lot of the time people with ADHD are also diagnosed with depression or anxiety disorders.

The hardest thing about ADHD is that it's invisible to others. As I said before, you're deemed as the naughty kid or the kid who doesn't listen and distracts everyone. A lot of the time, you're also deemed as the class clown. People can't see whats happening inside your brain, so they don't understand that how you're acting, is a reaction to whats going on in there. It's a very lonely disorder to have, and surprisingly, one that a lot of people struggle with. You would think that since a lot of people have it that the world would be more understanding, but unfortunately, that's not the case. I just ask one thing of my readers. Next time you see a kid struggling or acting out, and you instantly deem them as annoying or trouble making; try and consider whats going on in their brain for them to possibly be acting like that. It's totally possible that they could just be a really distracting kid, but it's also just as possible that they could be suffering with ADHD and they don't know how to help themselves. If you're parenting someone with ADHD I have a few tips for you.

Don't send them to a time out space if they're being too loud or over bearing. It's likely that they need help managing their feelings and need a cool down period. Offer them a book to read, or even having something like a fidget ball or cube on hand is such a helpful tool.

Teach them from a young age about their emotions. Explain to them how each emotion will make them feel and how to best handle those feelings. Explain to them that having emotions is completely normal, and that you are a safe space for them to work those emotions out. Don't just say that in the moment though, really mean it. It takes a while for kids with ADHD to feel safe in a space to let themselves go because of the constant reminder from society that it’s not okay.

Allow them a safe space to just run around and let out their crazy (I mean that in the nicest way possible). People with ADHD, especially kids, need daily exercise and a place to run around to get out that extra energy and to increase the dopamine that they are lacking.

They're most likely going to need extra help with schooling, and possibly a different way of learning and thats okay. It will take a few trials and errors to find the right way that works for them and thats completely normal.

Last but most certainly not least, don't treat them any differently than their siblings or friends. I know first hand what that feels like and trust me, it only makes them feel more isolated. They already feel alone and different in their head, they don't need to feel like that from other people as well.

I truly hope this all helps and if you have any questions about yourselves or someone else please don't hesitate to ask. Just a quick disclaimer, I am not a doctor, I am just someone who has suffered with this all her life. My eldest son also most likely has ADHD so I know the signs to look out for. Message me if you need anything.