Ah, Steady Sam. He drives the speed limit – or slower, doesn't show his emotions, and can't say no when asked to do something for someone. Is this you or someone you know?

THE S (STEADINESS) STYLE

These are people with the Core S (Steadiness) behavioral style. The S factor in our behavioral profile measures how we handle the pace of the environment. The higher the S the slower the pace and vice versa. Steady Sam is quiet, friendly, and helpful. He's stressed by conflict, so he'll often give in during a disagreement to avoid hurting another's feelings and to keep the peace.

Sam is people-oriented and methodical in his approach to tasks. He likes to have a particular way of doing things from which he doesn't like to deviate. He resists change unless given time to adjust to it.

S STYLE LIMITATIONS

If you have Sam's style, you may be limiting your effectiveness in several ways. You may be causing yourself stress by your difficulty in saying no and you may actually be causing others stress by clamming up and saying everything's fine when it's not and you both know it. You have a tendency to be too low risk, too indirect, and may hold a grudge forever.

If you are low in the S factor, you tend to be fast-paced, high risk, emotional, and unstructured. So you can see how those low in the S factor can lose their patience with Sam, and how he might be irritated by others' attempts to draw him out and pressure him to move faster. This is one source of conflict between these two types of people if they haven't learned how to understand and adapt to each other.

If you work or live with those who have a Core S style, here are some of the ways in which to communicate and not communicate with them to be effective:

DO:

•Be patient and show interest in them as people

•Be sincere

•Be logical, soft-spoken, non-threatening

•Provide personal assurances and guarantees

•Give them time to adjust to change

DON'T:

•Rush headlong or stick coldly to business

•Threaten or pressure them

•Be abrupt and rapid

•Force a quick decision

•Touch or move things on their desk

COMMUNICATION TIPS

When communicating with Steady Sam, smile and move at a relaxed pace; use small hand gestures, and don't stand too close. Speak in a warm, soft, steady voice and tone down the volume. Use phrases such as "take your time," "think about it," and "help me out." They respond well to assurances of safety and security.

Understand that people with the Core S style thrive on accommodating others and need your sincere appreciation for all the help they give. To be effective with them, be patient with their slower pace yet move them along when a decision is needed. Understand they may not want to talk things out in a disagreement; so give them time, don't yell at them, and encourage them to speak their mind by genuinely listening to their concerns. If someday they disappear from your life without a word, don't waste time wondering why because you’ll never know.

Admire Sam – and Samantha – for their helpfulness, their ability to calm and stabilize others, their loyalty, and their great listening skills. They bring serenity and structure to our lives.