The correct way to build self-esteem in children and adults is an unsettled issue. All you have to do is wander into a bookstore (before they cease to exist) and see all the books on the issue. Many theories conclude it is due to a lack of self worth. Well, how do you go about feeling more worthy?

Let’s say you just bought a really expensive car. How do you treat the car? Do you leave fast food leftovers in the car for weeks or is eating not allowed in the car? Do you drive it around with "Wash Me," scribbled out of all the dirt piled up on the back windshield or do was it every week? Well of course you treat it well. You invest in the appearance of your car because it is worth something to you. For this you will not be called vain or shallow.

This brings us to a new research field in self-esteem called appearance investment. However, the researchers are looking in the wrong direction. They are looking at the link between appearance investment and low self-esteem, when in fact they should be looking at appearance investment and how to build self-esteem.

If you invest in the appearance of your house, your car, or your pet. You do it because it is worth something to you. Well, how much do you invest in your appearance? Most people can think of one thing they could start doing to improve their appearance. Start doing it now. It could be something small. It does not need to be something large like losing 20 pounds.

Put on lipstick. Dye your hair. Paint your nails. Visit a dermatologist. Whiten your teeth. Put on a nice watch. Buy new clothes. Shave. Wear a perfume you love everyday. Wear heels. Put on makeup. Get a pedicure. Have a facial. Buy new shoes. Arch your eyebrows. Wear shoes instead of flip-flops. Trim your hair. Exfoliate your skin. Get a tan. Wear earrings. Purchase new underwear. Workout. Deep condition your hair. Wear lip gloss. Learn a new hairstyle. Brush on mascara. Shine your shoes.

Just do something. Will doing this make you cured so you can now tour the country giving motivational speeches? Probably not. Is this a major building block in how to build self-esteem? Absolutely. I only wish more therapist talked about how to build self-esteem by building up yourself.