May was an amazing month for me, as I had the good fortune to travel out of town three of the four weekends. I started off in Scottsdale, Arizona and went to Naples, Florida and then London, England. Each trip was unique in its own way – and in all of them I got to spend time with family and friends...

However, I kept noticing one thing that struck me over and over again that I found so upsetting. What you may wonder? Particularly in airports but also just out and about, I was distressed by how couples were talking to each other (both what they were saying and how they were saying it). Yes I know that 1) travelling is stressful and 2) sometimes our significant others can by annoying – but does that mean it is ok to snap and bark at each other? How can anyone feel good when they are spoken to like "that", even if the other person didn’t really mean it? Now I’m not suggesting that you fall into this category (but you might...). But, either way, I think it is worth taking a look at how you treat those closest to you when you are stressed. How do you sound? I have learned from personal experience that I used to sound much harsher than I ever intended (or certainly thought I did!). It is not pretty to come to this realization, but the good news is that it’s an easy fix with a HUGE payback!! You might be saying "why should I be the one to take the first step here – why can’t it be him?" Well, in my experience the woman is the one who initiates these types of changes and we just have to accept that reality (yes, it can sometimes go the other way... but rarely!). However once we change, our men usually respond positively. So does it really matter in the end who starts???

So I’d like to offer up a 21 day challenge – to change your tone. When you are about to say something negative or difficult, take a deep breathe, smile and be over the top in the opposite direction if you have to. Trust me, it won’t sound as over the top when you say it as it will in your head! I promise you that mastering this little change will be noticed and will make a surprisingly BIG difference.

Are you in?