Adultery: a DANGEROUS SIN

Mike is a loving man – fully devoted to his loving wife named Amie; they had been married for over 15 years – with three beautiful children to show for it. But as of recent times, Mike noticed that his wife was not being as affectionate and loving as she used to be; it seemed something was bothering her, and so Mike asked her if anything was wrong, but as the many a times, Mike would try to ask Amie if everything was ok, she would just shrug her shoulder – insisting that it was just the stress of managing the home – along with the problems she had to deal with at her job as a night nurse, and that she needed a little time to figure things out. Considering what his wife told him, Mike told himself that his wife was going through some harmless phase of some kind, and it would be best to just give her a little time to work this out. However, one day, Mike decided he would leave work extra early on a particular day – pick up some flowers and go home to his wife to surprise and cheer her up. Upon reaching his home and entering the house, Mike smilingly held up the beautiful bouquet of flowers in his hands, and as he quietly walked up the stairs and headed in the direction of the master bedroom, to his dismay, he heard sounds like voices coming from the bedroom; considering that his three children were not at home during this time of the day, and that one of the voices coming from the bedroom was a male voice, Mike found himself thinking the UNTHINKABLE. It seemed that in that moment, his though was plagued with a sense of deep foreboding – that something could be dreadfully wrong; with heart pounding and feeling as if his stomach was in knots, Mike, in that split second of time, tried to reverse his thought by trying to convince himself that he could be wrong on what his mind and body was telling him, but as he quickened his step to the bedroom door and nervously turned the knob, his fear had been realized – as he looked ahead into the room he was greeted by the tragic and painful scene of his beloved wife Amie in the act of adultery with another man.

In one moment, this adulterous act had totally shattered a marriage – including the dreams and hope of a lifetime. The life that Mike and his wife had built no longer was - as the mother of his children, the woman of his dreams, his lifetime partner now lay spoiled, damaged before his very eyes; something had happened that could not be erased; that could never be forgotten or taken back.

The above is an illustration of what adultery can do to a marriage and is indicative of what goes on in this world.

Why Adultery is Wrong

The sin of adultery is a widespread problem – especially here in the United States. In this day and age, it would seem that people are unaware of the seriousness of this sin, and people often brag about having affairs with another man’s wife or vice versa. It seems that people have no regard to what God says about the sin of adultery and the damaging impact it can have upon not only those who commit the act but also upon the children of the parents who does such thing.

Some foolishly believe that God forbids fornication and adultery because he wants to withhold pleasure or enjoyment and be cruel to us. On the contrary, God knows the inevitably painful result such act would bring, and he wants us to be protected from it.

I want you to notice what the ancient Job said about adultery: “If mine heart have been deceived by another woman, or if I have laid wait at my neighbor’s door; Then let my wife grind unto another, and let others bow down upon her. For this is a heinous crime; yea, it is an iniquity to be punished … For it is fire that consumeth to destruction …” (Job 31: 9-12). Job sees adultery as that like a fire that burns and brings a person or even your family life to destruction. The wisest man Solomon wrote: “Can a man take fire into his bosom and not be burned? … So, he that goeth in to his neighbor’s wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent” (Proverbs 6: 27,28). In verse 32 Solomon further states: “But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul.”

The sad thing is that Solomon who spoke out against adultery did not live up to what he himself taught, because he had set his hand to experience all kinds of pleasure – including the wrong things. Against all of God’s warnings, Solomon finally accumulated seven hundred wives and three hundred concubines - ONE THOUSAND women. He had the best-looking, the best-built, the most intelligent, the smoothest skinned, the most voluptuous women in the land. He no doubt also had women of just about every race. He tried everything he could think of. But what happened? “… and his wives turned away his heart. For it came to pass when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the Lord his God, as was the heart of David his father” (1 Kings 11: 3,4). Solomon too was preoccupied with too many women, and this may result in his forfeiture of eternal life in the kingdom of God – because he knew better; he knew that his lifestyle was wrong, but it is God who will ultimately judge Solomon.

Consider This

Once a woman is robbed of her virtue; once the offense has been made, it can never be taken back! How can you pay a man for ruining his life and future? How can you placate a man whose dreams have been shattered? How can you restore to a man his spoiled and besmirched wife? You can’t. The adulterer always stands the risk of having his life taken through the unrequited vengeance of a hurt and wronged husband; Any man who can’t see and understand lacks understanding! Notice how Job describes the adulterer: “The eye also of the adulterer waiteth for the twilight, saying No eye shall see me; and disguises his face” (Job 24:15). The thing is people think that God does not see the intent of the heart and understand that God watches and weighs the action of men; the Bible says, “For the ways of man is before the eyes of the Lord, and he pondereth all his goings” (Proverbs 5:21).

Lusting after another man’s wife is breaking of the seventh commandment which forbid adultery and also the commandment to not covet or have desire for your neighbor’s wife. Engaging in adultery means a person desires to have that which is not theirs to take. In Matthew 5:28, Jesus warned, that “… whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” In the Old Testament, a man had to commit or carry out the physical act of adultery to be guilty of this sin, but now Christ, who came to magnify the law, now declared it to be wrong and sinful to lust after a woman in the mind; Christ saw this as a sin - because lusting after a woman means that you desire the woman – wanting to enter into a sexual relationship with her; it means that if the opportunity presented itself, you would jump headlong to fulfill your lust with the woman; you would not refuse your lust; to God this is committing a sin. James 1:14,15 reveals the danger of lusting when it says, “But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust is conceived (in the mind), it bringeth forth sin.”

I know that it is not a popular thing to talk about lust and sin in this way, because it seems that many in this days and age tend to see the teaching of the Bible on these subjects as some antiquated or old - fashioned law – having no relevance to our society today, but you would be wrong in thinking this way, because the resulting harm adultery brings has never changed and neither has the truth of God. Many famous personalities – such as movie stars and basketball players have a tendency to brag about their many sexual conquests - which involved sex outside of marriage and dating married women and things of that sort, but in admitting to these things, they do not seem to realize they are ignorantly glorifying a very dangerous wrongdoing or sinful act; the Bible says, “… be sure your sins will find you out” (Numbers 32:23).

Those who rush headlong into adultery do not often think of the consequences of their action or how truly dangerous this sin really is; the thoughts of the immediate pleasure that comes through adultery seem to blind the perpetrators of the consequences. In an adulterous relationship, people mostly have to hide and share their adulterous pleasure in secret. A singer, by the name of Billy Paul came out in 1971, with what the world viewed as popular song – called or titled, Me and Mrs. Jones; this song spoke of an adulterous affair between a married woman and a man who desired her; in that song, Mr. Billy Paul spoke of how they would meet at a certain café in secret and how they had to be extra careful so as to avoid being found out; they had to hide because they knew what they were doing was wrong and that there would likely be severe consequences if they were found out.

To commit adultery is to give in to lust and wrongful desire. The Bible says, “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls” (Proverbs 25: 27). God created man to exert self-control over our life; he gave us a mind that can reason and think and to weigh the consequences of our action. We must realize and be conscious of the great harm; the great and devastating damage adultery can bring to our life; we need to stop and ask ourselves if a moment of pleasure is really worth destroying your family and the family of others – just because you have a desire to fulfill your lust by seeking to take what is not yours to take in the first place. Think of the many homes and families that has been damaged because of an adulterous affair.

Hopefully, this article may help someone to avoid falling into this trap of adultery or to cease the act of adultery – because it is simply not worth destroying your family over; adultery will only result in pain, sorrow; either way, man is going to have to answer to God for the wrong we have done in this life.