Most of the time when you fail or experience pain and depression due to frustrating events in your life, you are inclined to blame external elements or even other people for your misfortunes. Although it happens that you encounter trouble caused by things beyond and outside of yourself, there are also certain aspects in your personage you tend to overlook, which eventually gave way to such dismal outcomes.

Changing how you think is changing yourself. Easier said than done. In actuality, altering your perception of things and the world at large is nowhere near as easy as just mouthing the words to yourself. The beliefs you hold in your mind are lifelong products of your experiences and influences, strengthened and produced since your childhood days. Referred to as "core beliefs", these staunch ideas are inherent to each one of us, and they play a crucial role determining the course our lives would take.

Since they are deeply ingrained into your psyche, you cannot expect to change or replace them overnight. The time it took for them take root into your subconscious has given them a firm hold, which implies that conscious effort, strong will, and the desire to change are necessitated on your part. To your advantage, managing to change your pessimistic or illogical core beliefs to positive, beneficial ones would strengthen your sense of self and boost your self-esteem. In effect, you stand a better chance against surviving pain and overcoming depression and anxiety should you encounter the force of life's difficulties.

To start you off, here are some common negative core beliefs and the suggested positive ones you can use to take their place.

Winning and success are inborn traits.

Given that each one of us is endowed with inherent potentials to help us succeed, not tapping into them and using them incorrectly would definitely mark us for certain failure.

Suggested replacement: Winning and success are dependent on my will to win and succeed.

I am who others think I am.

Huge mistake. The way you see yourself is the image you project to others, which in turn is reflected back to you. Determining the kind of person you want to be is dependent entirely on your own will and what kind of person you think yourself to be.

Suggested replacement: I am the best person I could possibly be.

Difficulty would only bring pain.

Although facing hardships is not a walk in the park, allowing yourself to just focus on their negative aspect and resigning yourself to the perimeters of your comfort zone for the rest of your life would be detrimental to no one else but yourself. Remember: In order to extract the juice of an orange, it has to be squeezed first. Like you, you would not realize the apex of your capacity if you steer clear from all sorts of difficulty.

Suggested replacement: Overcoming difficulty would bring out the best in me.

I am just as good as everybody else.

Being one with the crowd does have its advantage: mediocrity and a free ticket for not achieving self-fulfilment. Studies conducted at Harvard University have confirmed that every person has at least one ingenious trait, meaning there has to be one area in life where each of us can excel. But the challenge lies with determining what this area is. To do so requires courage to defy our self-consciousness by realizing our true potentials.

Suggested replacement: I am as excellent as I choose myself to be.