I want to ask you a question. It is the most important question I can ask you, and I wonder if you could provide me with an answer within 10 seconds. Most people cannot. Here it is:

What, exactly, do you want to do with your life?

By exactly, I mean a complete description of how you want to live your life including the most important goal you’d like to achieve. So answers like “make money”, “live in a big house”, or “meet someone special” have no place here. Such vague, non-specific answers are given by most people, and it is a sure sign that they haven’t identified what they really want to do with their lives.

The reason why it is so important to know the answer – in detail – to the question is because the answer reveals your dream. Your dream is unique to you, and it represents something very important to your happiness and growth as a person. It is an expression of the real you and gives enormous meaning and purpose to your life.

So how do you know what your dream is? Many people say to me “If only I knew what I really wanted”. If this applies to you, then here’s my top tips to identify your dream:

1. Take the time to think seriously about what you want to do with your life. Ask yourself “How would I truly want to spend everyday if I could choose freely”. This is serious time and you should spend at least an hour everyday working out the answers to this question.

2. On a sheet of paper, write down all the things you really enjoy doing and that you have a passion for. Write down all of the wonderful things you’d like to try too. For example, my list contains: working with computers, writing, motivating others to succeed, playing guitar, music, cooking, travel, history, the arts.

3. On another sheet of paper, write down all of the things you definitely DON’T want in your life. This is a great technique and brings clarity. For example, on my list, I have: No repetitive work, no bosses, no 9-5, no outdoor tasks, no relationships, no mysticism, no routines. Be honest with this. If you don’t like doing something, write it down. Duty has no role here; this is for you. If you don’t like doing something, write it down.

4. Ask: “Who is this for?” Do you want to live a dream to gain approval from others or do you want to do it because YOU really want it for yourself? Your dream doesn’t need anyone else’s approval, it is all about YOUR life, not theirs. Wanting approval for a dream poses a threat: What if others don’t approve? Do you make them happy or yourself happy? Have a dream because it is something you truly want to do; something that is important and gives meaning to your life because you deem it so. Obviously, approval from others is nice. But if others don’t approve of the lifestyle you choose, then don’t let it make a difference to you. Have the courage to be yourself and live the life you deem appropriate and not the life others deem fit for you.

5. Your dream is something special. It should excite you, fill you with a burning passion and a determination to achieve it. If you’re lukewarm about it then chances are you won’t give it your best shot. It should be something that you absolutely, definitely and positively HAVE to achieve. Failing to achieve it simply isn’t an option because it will make you seriously miserable and unhappy if you don’t get what you want. It is vital that you have this commitment to your dream because a wishy-washy approach just won’t cut the mustard. Think. Plan. Write it all down. Set goals. Then take action each and every day to take you closer to your dream.

Time for me to sign off. Please don’t just read this article and then move on to something else. TAKE ACTION. Use the tips to help you identify what it is you want from life. Remember the question:

“What, exactly, do you want to do with your life?”

Only you can provide the precise answers.

Until next time.