If you've broken up with your boyfriend, then you may be wondering how to get him back. Wouldn't it be great if you knew how to bring him back and save your relationship?

Couples break up for all kinds of reasons. Often, these are just silly reasons, and both parties regret the split and get back together again. On the other hand, things may have been going wrong for a while and the break up may come as a relief to both parties.

If you do want to get back together with your ex, then you need to be sure that you're doing it for the right reasons. If he initiated the break up, you might be angry and want revenge. While that may be perfectly understandable when you're still reeling from the shock of the split, it's ill-advised to try to get back with your boyfriend just so you can then dump him, for "revenge".

Once you have searched your heart and know that you want your boyfriend back for all the right reasons, you have to assess whether now is the right time to attempt a reconciliation. If the break up is very fresh, then he may need some time to himself before you make any overtures to him.

** So What Can You Do? **

Now is the time to gain some perspective on the split. It can also be a useful time to do some things just for yourself. For instance, if you gave up certain hobbies and interests to spend more time with him when you were together, now may be the right time to focus on those hobbies again.

Giving yourself some time out on your own may become a great period of self-growth. If you were a bubbly and independent person before you met your boyfriend, you may have found yourself becoming a little dependent on him and checking with him to see what his plans were before you made plans for yourself.

In fact, if you look back over your relationship, you may be shocked to discover just how much independence you gave up so you could be with him as much as possible.

It's easy to become consumed by that loved up feeling in a relationship, especially when it's brand new, but if you slowly lose your independence bit by bit, you may start to wonder just who you are.

So why not devote some time to yourself before you attempt to get him back, so you can rediscover the person you really are?

** Catch Up With Your Friends **

You may also be guilty of neglecting your friends while you were in the relationship. If so, now is the perfect time to catch up with them and even apologize for discarding them during that period. If you're lucky, they'll forgive you and want to hang out with you again.

You may find yourself having so much fun with your friends that you might start to wonder how you could have started to neglect them in the first place!

Just about everyone needs friends, and as you get older it can become harder to make new ones, so if you value your friendships, make sure you nurture them.

** How To Bring Him Back **

Now that you've spent some time on yourself and you've reconnected with that person you used to be before you met him, you can start thinking about saving your relationship. If you really want your ex boyfriend back, then you need to reconcile with him the right way.

For instance, leaving angry phone messages isn't going to help your attempts to get back together.

Instead, a pleasant phone call asking how he is and if he would like to catch up for a coffee or a walk in the park can be much more effective.

If you're worried that you'll become tongue-tied when you see him again, then perhaps writing down all your feelings may help. You can even burn it when you're finished, or if you'd rather send him a letter, you can rewrite it so that you're only expressing positive emotions to him. However, it's okay to let him know you regret the split.

Once he sees that you'd like to get him back but you're not angry, bitter or berating him for the break up, reconciling with you will have much more appeal to him.

So if you want to bring him back, remind him of all the good times you shared together. If there were a lot more good times than bad and you both decide to work on any issues that led to the break up, you've got a great chance of saving your relationship and being happy once more.