The social pressures we feel about how we look take their toll on even the most confident of people. This article captures some new approaches to this issue.

Firstly, there is little we can do to tackle the media industry that idolises sexual images. But, in truth we all have the capacity to appreciate ourselves just the way we are. We owe it to ourselves to do just that!

When the way we look - our weight and /or physical appearance - does not match the popular impressions in the media of tall, thin young women, what do we do? Do we stop to think? Are they happy? Or are they happier than we are just because they are taller or slimmer?

We give ourselves lots of heartache by our estimation of the comparative happiness of others. We sometimes forget the pleasures in our lives, what makes us tick and what brings us joy.

If we let social pressures take their toll, we will inevitably give in to feelings of inadequacy: This may lead us to take drastic measures like cosmetic surgery to change the way we look for all the wrong reasons. But, unless these changes are honestly sought, they will only lead us to feelings of dissipation and a consistent urge to keep changing.

Other times the lack of appreciation of ourselves can lead to feelings of social insecurity. While it’s only natural to feel anxious before giving a public speech, some people experience a constant fear of interacting with others. Paranoid thoughts that others will judge us are underlined by deeper social anxieties issues.

How then can we ensure that social pressures do not interfere with our intimate times?

We need to appreciate and indulge ourselves in what makes us tick. Our personalities are unique to us and they are greatly appreciated by our partners, friends and families. Ask your partner what unique personalities he sees in you? For some it is their complex, intellect and funny personality that makes them tick. For others it might be their reserved introvert nature. Remember we are not all the same.

And our uniqueness is a testament that we can’t all fit into the genre that is depicted in the media.

Of course there are a variety of reasons why we may experience loss of intimacy apart from social pressures. It could be due to the environments we are in. Remember we are in an economic crisis at the moment. For some this has meant that they have had to compromise in their living arrangements. Many of us may have money worries or experience pressure at work, or at home. All these issues may play a vital part in the way we feel with others and with our partners.