So you’ve met a great guy, and you’ve gone out on a few dates. He is charming, funny and attractive. He’s a great prospect! Who knows where this could all lead? There’s only one catch. He isn’t calling you. Do you sit around and wait for your "boyfriend" to give you a ring? Are you getting anxious?

The pattern is often predictable.

You meet on an online dating site or through friends, and you exchange phone numbers. At this point, he is genuinely interested in developing a connection of some sort with you. I qualify this because his intentions at this point are yet unclear and have more to do with the context surrounding your acquaintance. If, for example, you met in an adult chat room then his interest in you is purely sexual. However, if you met through a friend or on a general dating site than he is most likely interested in a casual dating relationship situation to start.

He’s just not "there" yet.

The casual dating phase of a relationship is generally longer for men than women. This is particularly true for men as they mature. Many men view casual dating as an opportunity to get to know someone without the accountability of exclusivity. This is one of the major reasons why they guy you’re interested in isn’t calling you as frequently as you might like.

He’s seeing other women.

Men enjoy dating without the "strings of commitment" because, quite frankly, we enjoy keeping our dating options open. Moreover, this gives us a loophole to disengage from people guilt free. If we’re not implicitly and clearly in a monogamous relationship we’re not going to feel the need to call you every day or feel anxious about seeing other people; and if a man is keeping his options open and dating other people, he’s going to be too busy to call you. Your guy has limited bandwidth.

You were intimate too early on

Unfortunately, men also cite confusing double standards when asked why they just stop calling. Amongst the most troubling is the "she was too easy" rationale. Cultural stereotypes and biological imperatives aside, some men find a fast paced race toward intimacy to be a "turnoff". The underlying reasons are probably rooted in cultural perceptions, or a sense of sexual intimidation. It isn’t fair, it’s confusing, but it’s true.

He doesn’t think you’re interested in him!

Conversely not showing any outward signs of interest in a man can also lead to a lack of communication. Men are not immune to bouts of insecurity when it comes to relationships. We want to know that a woman genuinely enjoys our company and finds us interesting, attractive and masculine. It may be worth examining how you interact on a date. Are you engaged in the conversation? Do you initiate communication? We want to know our interest in you is going to be appreciated and reciprocated.

He’s not interested.

Whilst I don’t discount legitimate reasons for his inability to spare a few moments to reach out to you, more often than not, the reasons have more to do with his interest level in you. If you feel unappreciated and are waiting for days or weeks for your suitor to pick up the phone, it’s time for you to move on.