Mature Singles - Online Dating Safety in Online Chat Rooms

Social IssuesDating

  • Author Kathryn Dawson
  • Published April 23, 2010
  • Word count 804

Online chat rooms have proved extremely popular with mature singles over the years and no wonder. They allow you to get to know someone without ever having to meet them face to face or giving away any personal information or letting them know what you look like. It sounds perfect but there’s one possible downside- the safety factor.

One of the main concerns people have when contacting others in online chat rooms is that of safety. This is especially so for mature singles who didn't grow up in the internet age and aren't as savvy with computers and networks.

This kind of fear can put a real damper on your online hunt for love but it needn't. Here are some simple tips you can follow to make sure you're safe in online chat rooms.

First, let's look at chat rooms are and how they work.

Chat rooms offer a fun and convenient way to meet and interact with people from all over the world. They're especially handy for seniors who are not as mobile as they once were and may not know the right places to go. In any event, they're perfect for anyone looking for their dream partner.

So how do they work?

Essentially, you connect to a chat room network and look for a chat room fitting your interests, in your case, mature singles. Depending on the system, you may be able to narrow to choice down to specific interests or parts of the country.

Different networks and chat software have their own interfaces but most work like this. You register on the network, choose a handle or nickname and enter the chat room. Typically you'll see a list of the other users currently online and the main part of the screen will consist of scrolling text which is the conversation currently underway.

You're free to follow this conversation as it unfolds or meanders and you can jump in with a comment whenever you want. Just type in your message and press enter and it will appear on the screen as part of the conversation.

Where is gets interesting and possibly risky is if a private chat is initiated. On your chatroom dashboard you'll find a command to chat privately with a specific user. One many systems you just click on the users name and the option pops up. And you'll no doubt have requests from private chats from other users.

If someone makes a comment you like and you feel you'd like to get to know that person better, click on invite to private chat. The other party is free whether to join you or not. In fact, there are settings in most chat programs that allow users to automatically refuse all requests for private chats. But if the other party accepts, a new window pops up with just your two handles listed. You are now free to chat to that person with total privacy. So how do you keep things safe?

Obviously you're a mature adult with years of life experience. But we're talking about an environment which may be new to you - a heady mixture of internet chat rooms and affairs of the heart. Sometimes our emotions can overwhelm us and cloud our judgment. Usually this is part of the magic of a new relationship but it can also lead to problems. So here are some tips.

• Read the chat room's instructions carefully. Make sure you know how to log off quickly if you need to and be clear on the commands you need to block private chats.

• Choose you handle carefully. Calling yourself ‘sexgoddess’ is likely to draw a lot of attention to yourself. Make it something innocuous and anonymous in the beginning; you can always change it later.

• Obviously, inexperienced users are considered easy marks. So spend the first few days just reading the conversations and seeing how people interact. If you make a few gaffs, just change your handle and try again until you know your way around. The more chat room savvy you come across as, the less of a mark you'll be.

• Act as you would in the real world. Would you hand over your name, address and phone number to a stranger that you met on the street or in a bar?

• Above all, remember you are in control. Never let anyone pressure you into doing anything you're not comfortable with such as revealing your real name or agreeing to meet.

Fear can put a real damper on the online search for love for mature dating singles. But you just need to have a little savvy follow a few rules and have a system in place to happily spend hours in fruitful chats. And who knows? Your next chat might just well be with that special person you've been looking for.

Kathryn Dawson writes about a senior dating service in the UK focusing on those looking for mature dating on the internet.

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