There's nothing worse than having a sexual encounter and wondering what your partner is thinking throughout the whole thing, or trying to perform that move you heard about just perfect, or trying to move your body in the way you think looks sexiest to your partner instead of just moving it the way that feels good to you.

The insecurity that comes from a lack of self confidence sexually makes you have to put way to much thought into sex and takes away from the spontaneity, pleasure, and steaminess of the whole situation.

Becoming sexually confident is imperative to letting go and experiencing sex to the fullest, and there are a few ways to become more confident starting right now.

First, throw body image out the window before you begin any sort of sexual experience.

Focusing on holding your body in the perfect form so your partner gets the best view possible is unnecessary and takes away from your pleasure. Your body is not a mystery to your partner! They know what you look like from those rare moments you let yourself relax and loosen up and they know what you feel like when you are not naked.

Unless you think they are somewhat challenged in their perception of your body when they touch you then you have to know that they have already 'seen' your body with their touch and they love the extra lumps or bumps. And if they run away screaming when you get naked, which you must think they will to hold it all in, then they were not worthy of your sex to begin with.

Secondly, learn and be honest with what turns you on.

Self pleasure is the best way to figure out what you like and what you don't like. Men have an easier time with this but women tend to skip the self pleasure and leave it up to the men to figure it out.

Doing that is not fair to the man because it takes away from his pleasure and it makes him search out your magic spot, which he sometimes just can't find.

So women, go out and buy a vibrator. Contrary to popular belief you don't need to use the vibrator as a simulation of a penis to figure out what will give you an orgasm. Most woman have orgasms from stimulation of the clitoris and once you feel what it should feel like then it will be extremely easy to guide your man to that spot and let him feel what it feels like to make you orgasm. And as a bonus he will view you as a woman who knows what she wants in bed which should make you view yourself with more confidence.

Lastly, arm yourself with tons of information.

Read up on what turns the opposite sex on and be more confident that you are going to do things that they will like or things that will please them. There are lots of books out there that will give you all the information you need to know and the information normally comes from people that had to learn on their own without the help of someone else. Arming yourself with information is especially helpful to men.

A woman's body can be harder to figure out than a man's body and when it comes to having sex with a woman there are many more things to consider then just how a certain move feels to her. You need to take into consideration all of her senses while you are having sex and if you are a fumbling mess then she might lose interest, and an orgasm, very quickly.

Another way to get information is to ask questions in the moment.

If you are wondering if the way you are performing oral sex is actually turning them on or if it's making them wish you would move just a fraction to the left then you need to ask. This releases the pressure on you to find the right spot and it gives you the power to get their quickly without having to think about it.

The same goes for the other side of the situation. If you are getting oral sex and wish they would move a little to the left then you need to just go ahead and ask them to do it. There is nothing sexier than knowing your own body and what you like done to it and verbalizing it to your partner. You take out the mystery and thought that your partner has to go through while trying to figure out what's working and what's not working and you let them enjoy making you happy.

Becoming sexually confident means empowering yourself with information of what you like, being comfortable with yourself, and letting go and enjoying the moment while you are in it.