Saving Your Marriage
- Author Adeolu Adedigba
- Published September 20, 2010
- Word count 538
The case of husbands who cheat on their wives is painfully common. When this happens to you, you may wonder whether there is any more reason for saving your marriage. This is a very challenging situation, and answering the question may appear difficult. However, you basically need to consider just one thing in order to determine the right course of action.
Would you fight for your marriage if you knew nothing about his cheating?
This does not mean that you should just enjoy staying in the dark as far as your husband's life is concerned. It is good to know what he is involved in. However, you should let this knowledge empower you instead of working the other way around as is often the case.
Let us go back to the pertinent question. How would you rate your relationship before you found out about his betrayal? Can you honestly say that you had more good times than the low moments? Now that you know that he has been cheating, what has really changed in the relationship? When you look at it objectively, you will see that nothing has really changed in the relationship. What will have changed, however, is your perception.
Cheating is not something that usually happens just in the spur of the moment. There is often a chain of events that lead to the unfortunate event. It is just that you had perhaps not taken a closer look to discover that your husband lacked something in your relationship.
Now that you have finally discovered that he has cheated, you will need to make some important decisions. If you take a look back at your marriage, you may discover that you were actually better off than many people. Although you faced some tough times, you may realize that you were largely a happy couple until the time that you discovered about the affair.
Here are some of the things you need to bear in mind when you want to find out whether there is need for saving your marriage.
Love is not simply switched off
The fact that your husband cheated on you does not really mean that he had stopped loving you. Do not be surprised to find out that his affair did not have anything to do with how he feels about you. What it means is that he had some need that was not quite fulfilled, which was what he sought. Love is not something to be switched off in an instant.
It could have just been a passing moment
When you discover that your husband has cheated on you, it will not necessarily mean that he has started another relationship at all. Perhaps it was a one-off thing for him, something that he never expected you to find out. May be he just wanted to fulfill a need but went too far before he realized his mistake.
His affair does not need to define the relationship you have
This is unless you let it have such powers. It is just you and your husband who can chart the course of your relationship. You do not have to let the affair drive a wedge between you so that you change your perception of happiness.
ADEDDIGBA ADEOLU
adeoluadedigba2009@yahoo.com
+2348034777871
adebuk2010@blogspot.com
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