My brother got married last weekend, and it is wonderful to see how happy he and his wife are together. I don't think I have ever been to a wedding where so many people passed comment that they are "true soul mates".

I know it is the thing that you are meant to think at a wedding, but it is not that often that this is what you are really thinking. It is very clear to everyone who knows my brother and his wife that they really are soul mates.

In contrast it is surprising how often you see a couple getting married who would appear to everyone else to have very little in common. It is also enlightening to talk to a person who has gotten divorced and discover that they knew from the start that the marriage wasn't really right, but they went through with it more because they wanted it to be right.

We are all adept at making allowances and excuses for things which in our heart of hearts we know are not actually how they should be. In relationships this is often because we have begun to doubt that there is that soul mate out there for everyone (and so feel that we quite simply expect too much and thus should learn to settle for second best), or perhaps it is because we don't actually really know what we want and so talk ourselves into wanting what is easily available.

We like to think that we have found our soul mate because some inner knowledge tells us that we should have a soul mate. We have an instinctive knowledge that we are not meant to be alone; that we are meant to spend our lives with someone with whom we have a deeper infinity, a deeper bond with.

One thing for sure is that if you give up on finding your soul mate you are unlikely to find them. In that frame of mind, even if you did meet up you would not recognize them, purely because your eyes, ears and mind had been closed to them. It would take a lot of effort on your soul mates behalf to manage to get through your defensive armory. But this too can happen; if it is meant to be, it is meant to be.

If you are seeking to find your soul mate the most important thing is to remain open to meeting that special person. Why make it difficult when it can be so much easier? The other thing, which is probably the most vital of all, is to ensure that you feel secure and confident. In this way, you will not settle for second best, you will not give up, and you will also have fun even when you are on your own.

Roseanna Leaton, specialist in hypnosis mp3s for confidence and to help attract your soul mate.

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