The crazy thing is the fact we all need to understand that marriage is about love and compromise and learning to live together. It takes a lot of work. After you feel like your marriage is on the rocks it is good to take a step back and look at what might be causing these feelings within you. We are all aware that some things can not be done in a marriage.

We all have our values. There are particular principles by which we live. Everyone has a list of things they will not tolerate. Ask a green naturalist to adjust to killing of whales. How may they ever do it? That is unacceptable to them. It might go against the grain of their soul. Similarly for many any extra marital love is totally unacceptable. For many people, to have a mate step out on them would mean to dissolving of their vows. For almost all people, this is a no brainer and they would rather divorce that bend on the issue.

Yet as I have already said, each relationship should be a middle ground. For example I may be in great and passionate love with my partner. But sometimes our spouse will ask us to fudge on things we do not want to. We could say yes or no. We will see that both ways of going could eventually end the union.

Understand that the quotes about love we all seem to know are there to show us what love can be and not to criticize our relationship. Everybody wants a love that lasts like we read about in the love quotes. But that love is one that is certainly acquired and not just handed to us.

A big deal breaker for many people is when their spouse is distant and cold in the relationship. It is crucial for people to feel the affection of their spouse. They need to know that they are there for them in all circumstances. If your spouse is cold it must be addressed immediately. You need their love and care.

In your marriage you will have your share of fights. Believe it or not, specialists say they clarify things, but do not dramatize, or raise your voice or offend. You must always respect your mate in the fight. But in any marriage fighting can damage a relationship if the frequency and intensity is too much for the spouses to take.

The goal of a good spouse is to learn how to get along with their spouse and learn artful compromise. A marriage will enable us to understand how to truly live together with one another. As we are instructed by our marriage, we see how to truly care for our mate and love them accordingly.

You are the master of your own destiny and if you want to turn a bad marriage around you have the power at your fingertips. We all want a marriage that is the envy of the neighborhood. But it is within us to make our dreams of a good marriage into a reality. We must use our abilities to make it happen.