What is the secret to being happy? Does happiness lie in the attainment of physical things such as wealth, strong relationships, good health, mental fortitude etc.? I think you already know that happiness does not lie in the attainment of anything physical. So what is happiness?

If you wish to fully understand what the state of happiness is then you must first understand what it is not! We all know that the rich are no happier than the ordinary worker. If happiness lay in the arms of another person then all we would have to do is find a partner and settle down to spend the rest of our lives deliriously happy. The world is full of stories about people who have gone from nothing to achieve their dreams only to become disillusioned with their attainments. A great many become despondent and even suicidal. So if happiness does not lie in material possessions or the arms of another or even in the attainment of our dreams where does it lie?

Well when you seek your dreams, material possessions, or even another person in order to be happy what are you really looking for. Is it the thing itself that you think will make you happy or the feeling you will get when you have the thing? Ponder that for a moment!

When something happens in your life it is not the event itself that makes you happy or unhappy it is how you perceive it that creates the inner change. How you view the event and how you think it affects you and your life is really all that there is in the situation.

"There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so", with these words, from Hamlet, Shakespeare describes at its essence a rarely acknowledged truth and sums up my previous statement. You are the one who puts a meaning to any event. You place that event in your life and decide whether it is good or bad depending on how you perceive it.

Two people can experience the same event but have very different views of it. The people who achieve great things in life hold the view that "everything happens for a reason". Behind every adversity there is a chance to start anew and gain valuable insight from what has happened.

Happiness truly lies within. You can actually decide to be happy. Let's take some time to do a short experiment. In a relaxed state recall all the things that you now have to be grateful for. Feel the gratitude for them as you do this. No matter how small practise a little gratitude now and do this for a few minutes. When you have finished continue reading.

Now do you feel better than before or worse? Of course you feel better. Gratitude is the starting point for happiness. By appreciating all those things that you already have you alter your perception. You also tend to attract more of them into your life. When you focus on things in your life and world that make you unhappy then you will teach your mind to look for things that make you unhappy. Eventually your entire outlook will be negative and you will also attract more things to make you feel unhappy.

Likewise if you focus on the things in your life that you are grateful for not only do you feel happier but you also start to attract more things that make you happy. The truth behind this is statement is that - you always get more of what you focus on! So start to focus on the things that you have that make you happy already.

After you have mastered this simple, yet sometimes difficult to maintain, attitude of gratitude you can move to the next step.

Start to change your perception of events, people, situations and even yourself by looking for the hidden positives. Everything has some positives! When you look for these positives you will find your perception of the thing changing. You will be less mentally involved in the negatives that surround you and more concentrated on the positives.

Thinking positive makes you feel happier. Everyone knows this but very few practice it. Starting here and now begin to alter your perceptions of the world that surrounds you and your place in it. Remember you always get more of what you focus on!

If you have some trouble getting into this frame of mind then try using the tools that are at your disposal. Seek out a hypnotherapist or purchase some good hypnosis recordings. There are many great ones available to help you think more positively and reinforce the mental work you are already doing. Use them to develop an attitude of gratitude. You can use hypnosis to direct your focus towards the things that make you feel happy!

I know two people each who picked 5 from 6 numbers on the lottery and won £5000. One moaned that he was 1 number off the jackpot and went around feeling like he had missed a great opportunity. The other person was delighted. He took his winnings and bought himself things that he still enjoys today. Which of these two people do you think is the happier? I must also note that the second man who won has won again and this time it was a larger sum. You always get more of what you focus on!