O.K. so you've been dumped, or maybe you were the dumper. Either way there is something missing and you want to tell the one that you love that you want to rekindle what you once had. Here are some guidelines to hopefully help you.

First of all understand why you were either broken up with or why you broke up. Understand what maybe you did wrong. Nobody is perfect and we must all realize that.

If you broke up with your loved one, try and understand why. Did he or she cheat on you? Did he or she do something other than that to devastate you? Did you start to lose trust, whether with justification or not? Did his or her shortcomings finally get to you? Did a life event happen that had you change your own outlook on what you wanted in life? These are some of the questions you need to understand the answers to before you can determine what it might take to rekindle your old relationship.

If you were broken up with, try and understand why as well. Did you cheat on him or her? Did you change the way you treated him or her? Did you start to point our his or her shortcomings? Did you lower his or her expectations of you because of a life changing event? (maybe your career got in the way and they needed more?). Did you do something that made him or her lose trust? These are just some examples of questions you need to ask yourself to understand why this happened.

People just don't leave one another for the heck of it. There is something that tells them it is time to go. And what you need to understand is what was it that did that. Take some time to yourself to understand why this could have happened no matter which side of the fence you were on. Then you will be ready to talk to him or her and reach out.

The first thing to realize, is you have to have communication. That is the key. Don't overdo the phone calls and the voice mails or ims or whatever communication media that you use. The other person is most likely in the stages of getting over you and harassment would just scare them away further. If you understand what made the relationship go downhill, then you need to understand what steps you would need to bring the trust back to the person you love. If you really love that person and want them back, you have to show them, not in an annoying way, and not with words, but with actions that show you are for real. And that is not going to happen overnight. Its a rebuilding process that you must adhere to and don't get too frustrated if you are not seeing results right away.

Just remember it ended for a reason, and when you figure those reasons out and want to comply to changes that are needed, then you will be ready to give that person what he or she needs for a long time. Just don't appear desperate. Things may not work out; there are no guarantees in life. I am just giving you some guidelines to follow to help you put yourself in the best position to possibly rekindle an old flame.