This article is meant to be an advice article on how you can at least put yourself in a good position to get your ex girlfriend back. "How Do I Get My Ex Girlfriend Back?" you ask? There are no guarantees because everyone is different. The first thing you need to understand before attempting this is simple: why do you want to get back with your ex back?

Relationships are funny, they all have their ups and downs. One day you are happy in your relationship and the next day you start to question it. If you are currently out of a relationship, regardless of who ended it, you have to be sure that getting that relationship back is what you want. Now your ex may have moved on, or maybe she claims to hate you and wants nothing to do with you. In this situation, it would be very hard to rekindle the relationship, but that doesn't mean you have to give up trying.

I always feel that all relationships go through three phases:

The initial phase

Boy isn't this the greatest feeling. You found someone that you are interested in and there is all kinds of excitement in the air. You wondered what you did without this person your whole life. This person is now your greatest pursuit. You want to impress and show this person all that you can to make sure she continues to be interested in you in hopes that this could be the one!

The middle phase

This is the phase where the comfort of being with this person has settled in, and you are now past the "she is perfect in every way" thinking that got you through the initial phase. She is still great, but now you are starting to recognize things that aren't so desirable. Now nobody is perfect, and we all know that, and there will be some imperfections, but this is the part of the relationship where if you really love and care about this person, those imperfections are tolerable and there may even be some differences that you will even learn from, appreciate, and maybe even start to change your own beliefs based on them.

The comfort phase

Ah, it has now been over a year or so, this person is part of your routine in life. You love her, you will have your differences, but if the love and connection is strong, you learn to tolerate almost anything. You both have now built trust in each other. This is the most crucial of the phases, because you are now locked in. She is your girlfriend, you are her boyfriend, and the level of expectations of each other have raised considerably.

O.K. so I wanted to cover the before picture of the relationship. That all shouldn't be knew to anyone. Relationships all start off great. Nobody is perfect until you fall in love. Well now during the comfort phase, something went wrong. Trust may have been lost somewhere. The sparks may have gone and the chemistry went. Something caused a break-up and now you want that person back.

I will write more articles about this, but the first bit of advice I can give all of you is be patient. Unless you did something so bad (and you know if you did), time can heal all wounds and will give you that opportunity to possibly rekindle the relationship.

Here is the tough part: how do you let the other person know you are interested in at least talking or getting communication back without harassing our hounding the person? That one is tough. A simple call to say hi is a good start. No need to call and start talking about the two of you and what happened and all that. Just a simple hi, was thinking about you and am interested in how you are doing. This may be a voice mail or she might actually pick up, but either way keep it simple. I wouldn't expect the conversation to last too long and you shouldn't either; so keep it simple! This will at least send a signal that she is on your mind, without having her feeling threatened.

What you don't want to do is start flooding her phone with voice mails and text pages. That would be a big turnoff and she will see your desperation and that will definitely creep her out. Keep the initial contact simple, give her time to let everything sync in. Don't bash her, or make up stories to test her, just be yourself and honest. You might be surprised that she may have been thinking about you too. And if you really love her, you will give her the time she needs to make a decision if she wants to restart a relationship with you.