The moments after a breakup has occurred are the hardest of all. It’s not hard to think about how you want your ex back but you know he or she may not want to speak with you. However, if you want to get back together with your ex, you should know you are already on your way there.

How is this? Believe it or not, you are seeking the help you need to win them back. You understand how important the relationship is and are taking steps to rectify the situation. If you want to know how to get back together with your ex, you need to know first what you need to do. The first thing you need is a plan.

Before you go any further, cut off any contact you may have with your ex. Too often people think if they are constantly available for their ex, it can win back their hearts. Sadly, this is not the case. All you are doing is hurting yourself and possibly them.

If you are there for your ex, you are giving them a relationship type benefit but with no strings attached. You may know someone or some friends of yours who have been broken up for some time but are still sleeping with their ex? They say there is no relationship but is that really it? If you want to know for sure if he or she wants you, cut off all contact. You need to show them they gave up on the relationship and you at the same time. It’s like the old saying, "He or she wants their cake and eat it too." Don’t let this happen to you.

When you have a breakup, you need to walk away with a clean break. If there is a small chance of reconciliation, a separation can work. This forces you and your ex to live apart and each one of you on your own. This forces him or her to make the decision to live their life without you a part of it. It also takes care of any issues when it comes to yelling and screaming at one another. If you don’t see each other constantly, then you won’t be arguing near as much.

The best advice you will get when you want to get back together with your ex is to have no contact with him or her. No phone calls, no e-mails, no text messaging and no visiting. You also need it clear that when you both dropped the title of boyfriend/girlfriend, you both dropped everything else too. Step out of each other’s lives and be forced to live on your own for some time.