Once you have broken up, it may seem rather impossible to have a talk with your ex or even be near them for a time. You may even want to have him or her back in your life. If you can talk with each other cordially by phone then you already have way home. However, if not, there are easier ways to contend with this dilemma. If you want to get him or her on the phone with you, there are several techniques that can help you out. Yet, before you are able to put this skill to the test, you need to know the kinds of mistakes people make when they are trying to win back their ex.

(1) Don’t Beg

Begging is very annoying so just don’t do it. It’s quite ineffective and symbolizes that you are in a weak state of mind. This is the last thing you want to convey to your ex. If your ex should take you back based on begging, it is most likely that it will not last.

(2) No Life or Death Emergencies

Another thing that some people try to get their ex back is act like something is a life or death emergency. The one thing you don’t want to show is drama although your life may feel like a soap opera in that moment. If you want your ex back, it needs to be done very cautiously. Any sort of drama will keep your ex from being patient and is likely to pull them further away.

(3) Ignore the Romantic Movies

Remember that life is a reality; movies are based on fiction works. While it may be nice for the boyfriend to apologize with a nice drawn out speech to win back his girlfriend’s heart in the movies, real life is not a movie. So don’t even bother trying to leave a message on their answering machine or voicemail. Chances are they would have deleted it before you were through anyways even if you did mean it.

The common theme between all the three is too much drama. If you try to fix your relationship like a romance novel, you may as well end it before it begins again. Relationships cannot be summed up in an hour and half. It takes time so be prepared to take it. If your ex can get on the phone to call you, you need to create the two things: curiosity and self-interest.

Try using a line such as this when you call your ex: "Hey there. I was calling to say hi and to tell you thank you. You won’t believe it but what you did for me help to move on with my life and turn it around. If you don’t mind and have the chance, call me back so I can thank you in person. Talk to you when I'm not busy.

Think your ex will be curious by this message on the phone? Chances are the answer is yes. Some guys will get on the phone and will be dialing your number in no time. What do you do from there? First, you better have a plan. You don’t want to leave a message like that and not have anything to say. So if you want a chance to have him or her back in your life, you better know what you are going to say before they call wondering what they did that was so special.