I understand that you have reached a point where no matter what you do you cannot get her back. Maybe you tried to call her, to explain what went wrong or to prove your love. You know, to do the usual things that we do when we lose someone. Maybe you even tried to apologize if you are the one to blame for break up. But you can't make her listen to you. There is no way to get through. And the desperation start to slowly get over.

This article will help you understand what is wrong with this approach and what is the right way to get her back. But first of all you have to stop any attempt of making up. Cancel all the flowers you intended to send her and delete those touching emails you wrote. Take a deep breath and accept the situation. For now.

And to understand why I am saying that, I will show you a couple examples of behavior after break up:

First example: The Desperate One

He and she broke up after a big fight (or from whatever reason). She go home upset and promise never to talk with him again. But soon after that he realizes he have to get her back. .So in the evening he calls her in the hope that they can settle things down. She is still angry, refuses to talk with him and the relationship is finished. Next day he tries to call again. Then he sends messages. He tries to meet her, but she avoids him. Some more days go by without any sign of improvement, but he still won't give up. Now he asks for friends to talk with her and plead his case. She starts to feel annoyed and bothered. So she avoids him even more, which makes him even more desperate. If she would only listen to him...he is sure she will understand, and he will get her back.

Second example: The Smart One

They broke up, from whatever reason. She is sure that this is the end. He, on the other side, desperately wants to get her back. But because he is smart don't try to convince her, and they go their own separate ways. Days go by, and he don't try to contact her in any way. She is calm now and starts to wonder how come he accepted the break up so easy. Why he would not even try to do something about it. She is aware that she wanted to break up, but a little question starts to bother her: she really did not mean anything for him? Some more days go by, and she still don't hear from him. All the happy memories are coming back now, and she starts missing him. Maybe she exaggerated a bit, and they could have solved the problems after all. She starts asking around about him, just from curiosity...Is he dating somebody else? Is he talking about her? She don't know why she feels like would give anything to talk with him or to see him.

And then, suddenly she gets a message from him...he wants to talk...

If you followed so far, I am sure that you know already which one will get her back. And is not hard to see why. Relationships don't come to an end for no reason. And when they come to an end, is up to you to rebuild it or to break it even more.

Some time apart after break up will do more than just make her curious and missing you. It will make a statement about you: "I respect your wish to break up, and I am strong enough to take it." Do you know any woman who doesn't admire that attitude?

Some time apart will help you both reevaluate your feelings and your relationship. Will make you see that your feelings for each other won't die at the break up moment. And after all is easier to work on your relationship than to live without it.

Some time apart is essential if you really want to get her back.

Then, of course, is important how you proceed. You will have some more statements to make after first contact. Remember, the desperate one will not get her back. You will have to show some more qualities that women admire, beside love. But if you understand my point so far, and have the strength to do it, your chances to get her back are greatly improved.