Whenever a relationship breaks up, it’s usually one-sided, leaving one person with a low self esteem and their confidence shaken. The longer the relationship has been, the more shaken they can become. However, if your goal is to win back your ex, you’ll need to gather your strength and put your confidence back together. If you don’t, the chances of you getting your ex back will be much harder.

Before you do anything else, have a no contact rule for a month.

A month is long enough to get yourself together with little chances of him or her moving on. No contact means just that… no contact, no e-mail, no text messaging, no visiting and no phone calls of any sort. This month away is good for a variety of reasons but if your goal is to win back your ex, it can be much simpler with this time away.

Now that you started this no contact month, what should you do?

If you want to build your self confidence back, spend time with friends and go out into the dating world.

Friends and family are good when you want to rebuild your self image. Those family members and those friends who you trust and rely on and who care about you should be happy about spending time with you.

You need to heal your broken heart first.

• Spend time with those who understand, love and care for you.

Try to be around as many of these people as you can be. However, don’t be a burden on them because they do have their own issues in their lives.

• Go with friends to a great date site.

Nothing makes you feel more wanted than getting attention from the single men and women that you see throughout these places. Do you have to get into a relationship? Not at all. All you need is a good time with good company. If you want to have a serious relationship (which means you are ready to move on without your ex) then all the more power to you.

It may seem self explanatory and obvious that these 2 ideas are good ones to get back to your "normal" self. You want to be the happy person you once were, right? By doing these things, you can do just that. If your goal is to win back your ex, you can do this with an open heart and open mind. Go ahead and contact him or her again.