A perfect wedding isn’t only beautiful, it’s personal. It’s got carefully selected details that are meaningful to you and your fiancé. Here are some very simple ways to add your own subtle, unique touches to your ceremony and reception:

•Write your own wedding vows. It doesn’t have to read like poetry; the important thing is that it comes from your own heart. Print it out on an index card and keep it handy during the ceremony.

•Compile a CD with songs that symbolize your relationship or how it evolved. Play this during your reception or even burn a copy and distribute as souvenirs. Insert a small piece of paper explaining why you chose those songs.

•Instead of tossing your bouquet, present it to your mother (or a dear friend or mentor) during your reception. You can also have an additional bouquet made for your groom to present his mother at the same time.

•Guests often have free time on their hands during their reception. In the center of the table, place several pens and small pieces of paper in a pretty basket. Ask them to write their wishes, prayers, or advice for you and your fiancé. Compile in a scrapbook.

•Most wedding reception programs revolve around the couple: friends give speeches. Do something for the guests. Make a video of you and your fiancé talking about the people who’ve taught you what true love means. Mention friends who’ve demonstrated real loyalty, or family members who made great sacrifices for you. Intersperse your video with their photos. This is your chance to say thank you to all of them.

•If you have a close friend or family member who passed away, make him or her part of the occasion by inserting a small photo in your bouquet, or lighting a tribute candle at the church ceremony.

•If you have ethnic roots, incorporate a marriage ritual from your culture into your ceremony or perform it during your reception.

•Wear an heirloom. For example, you can use your grandmother’s veil, or wear a locket that belongs to your mother. This is an excellent way of creating a sense of continuity between generations, celebrating your own family even as you go on to begin your own.

•Prepare an audio-video presentation that will be played during the last dance of the bride with the father. This can be just a simple montage of childhood photos. A guaranteed tear-jerker!

•If you have kids, help them feel like they’re part of the new family by asking them to stand next to you as you say your vows.

•Add little elements that say something about your relationship as a couple. For example, if you’re giving away picture frames, insert a poem that you wrote or a copy of your wedding vows. If you met at a beach (and would rather not have a beach-themed wedding) incorporate shells into your table centerpiece.