You’ve met an amazing person, been out on a few dates, had a laugh and really clicked – maybe you’re even starting to fall in love. Everything is perfect, but a special occasion is rapidly approaching, ‘the night’ they stay over. All you desire is perfection, you want to create the right impression, but what if something goes wrong? Stress, stress, STRESS!

Breathe, relax

Chill the hell out. Anxiety isn’t pretty, it makes things seems ten times worse then they actually are and it takes all the fun out of sex. In fact, too much anxiety might end up meaning there’s no performance at all. It’s important you are mentally AND physically relaxed.

Lower your expectations. First-time sex with a new partner is more about exploring each other’s bodies and getting to know them better, rather than putting on a show and trying too hard to impress, there’s plenty of time for ‘adventuring’ to new levels.

Don’t rush, take your time

Do not start reflecting on previous partners, sexual or otherwise. What worked brilliantly with a previous partner may not work now. Different people respond to different things, and finding out what can be half of the fun, go with the flow. Nerves unfortunately can be somewhat of an annoyance, and sometimes it takes a while before someone can get naked and relax. Most of us have quarms with our bodys in one way or another. Simple steps such as turning out the lights can help you on your way if nerves are halting proceedings. If either of you are feeling too stressed, just take the pressure off; you don’t need to have sex there and then. Wait until you’re both sure that you’re ready.

If you find yourself in your own home, and sex is on the cards, then remember a little preparation goes a long way. Be welcoming, make them feel special and comfortable. Tidy up, buy in some of their favourite food and drink – rent a DVD and relax.

If you’re going back to their place, be a good guest. Don’t make an automatic assumption that they want to have sex with you. Turn up on time, look and smell good, compliment your host. Let them know you’re having a good time and like their company.

It’s good to giggle

Keep a sense of humour at all times, if an embarrassing situation arises simply laugh it off. Embarrassing situations can really kill ‘the moment’, don’t be shrouded in worry, guilt or awkward feelings. Even if you cringe at the time, it could be something you both look back on later and reminisce.

Remember, chill out, relax. Don’t expect too much and have a laugh – we only live once!