All of us have been emotionally hurt at one time or another—it doesn’t matter who and what you are, really. However, there are also people who seem so totally unreceptive to emotional pain. These are the type who doesn’t give a smack when someone tries to get close to them with a bit of an emotional bonding experience, and who rarely (if ever) attempt some kind of a smile. Maybe they have been badly burned or are just afraid of getting burned, so they build their little wall of emotional resistance for future security. But, if there’s one thing we should be thankful of out of being hurt, it’s that we learn a lesson from it.

Albeit painful, the lessons we get makes us able to grow and seek out new relationships which are healthier and more positive than the last one. We tend to look for and welcome people who treat us the way we would rather be treated. And if we have truly learned our lesson and got smart from it, we try to avoid the same people who were responsible for creating those negative and emotionally trying relationships that got us hurt in the first place. In this case, it’s the nice guys and girls who finish first. Being in a dreadful relationship with someone who treated you like dirt felt positively rotten.

But, you wanted your partner to at least treat you like the way he/she used to, so you opted to stay around, no matter how hard it was. You tried to be man (or woman) enough and bear the emotional pain that the other person caused, which only got worse because you stayed around. And after all the hurt and pain, when the relationship had its breaking point at last, you were so badly bruised and beaten that you can hardly crawl away. Not a very happy ending, but it can be—because after getting over the pain and moving on, that’s when you see just what it’s worth.

By looking back at your previous relationship, you’ll come to appreciate someone who treats you a lot better, so you cultivate relationships with a different sort of person. It’s not all depressing, though, because not all relationships can cause hurt or grief like that. A lot of people may have an awful problem or two in their lifetime, but that’s it (hopefully). After all, we’re all human and we have hearts that could break! The good thing about feeling the pain of being treated poorly and living through it to see the other side is learning from it. We get smart and we move on.

We know just when enough is enough. It’s either one creates an emotional wall for protection or simply gets out of the relationship. People have different ways of coping from emotional pain. Some take it hard and change their entire persona while hiding the pain and hurt that they actually feel. A lot of times the person who has been significantly hurt in the past also has a history of causing emotional pain. The thing is, getting hurt can be good for you. of course if you’re in pain right now, it sounds absurd, but when you look back after all the pain is gone you’ll truly appreciate the experience and the things you learned from it.

Just thank your lucky stars that you got through it and came out as a whole, new person, bearing the scars that would remind you of past mistakes.