Let me guess. You just broke up, you are miserable, lonely, desperate, in pain, and winning back ex girlfriend is your top priority. I believe I can help. If you are committed to winning back ex girlfriend, the following 5 steps will help.

1. Relax and remember to breath.

I am saying the world hasn't ended. The sun will rise in the morning. I know you are hurting, I get that. But you must not panic. Most people start calling constantly, texting their ex endlessly, showing up where they know they will be, begging, pleading, and promising the world. This will have the opposite effect, if this is you, stop.

2. Accept responsibility to yourself.

This is hard. I'm not saying accept all blame, no one is ever completely at fault. No one ever is. Understand what your part of the blame is. You will apologize for it, but not yet. By doing step 1 will permit you to gain some perspective on your girlfriends point of view. Acknowledge to yourself and accept your part in the break up. Understand what you do that frustrates them. Winning back ex girlfriend absolutely requires this step.

3. Continue breathing.

You now know life on earth will continue. And you have acknowledged your role in the break up. Now it is time to start winning back ex girlfriend. Here are the instructions. Tell your ex what you discovered about yourself in the first two steps. Tell them you now realize you were taking them for granted and not appreciating them. (News flash, that is why they broke up with you, end of discussion.), apologize for your actions, and tell them you agree with the break up. This is where you start breathing again. This is not the time to go further, leave it at those three things, and end the conversation.

This is slightly manipulative, but they will never know it. I don't care what you call this, reverse psychology, whatever, just do it. You pull, they push. Sound like an argument yet? This allows you to pull the same way they are, instead of a battle. I am most definitely not telling you to make them jealous, this always backfires.

4. Resume life.

If you can't do this, fake it and pretend. Do not avoid everyone you know. Go out with a friend you haven't seen in a while. Make people think you are ok with the break up. Do not make contact with your ex, no calling, texting, emailing, etc. If that can't be avoided, smile and be non chalant and friendly, like a stranger. Trust me, she is checking up on you, and she will notice your behavior. There needs to be some time before you continue your strategy, not months or years, three weeks to a month ought to be adequate. I have another important flash, your ex misses you, give that enough time to work for you.

5. Make contact.

It's show time. Contacting them after some time has passed in the beginning. Invite them to have coffee or lunch. This is not a date, just a short timed meeting, do not make this an all day or evening affair. Nothing that they can perceive will lead farther. When you meet, let the past lie. Proceed as friends that haven't seen each other in a while. Keep it simple and light, make them laugh. Now, you are ready to cement yourself back into their mind. Are you ready? Make a motion with your finger to the side of your mouth, politely letting them know they have something on their face, pretend They will instantly grab their napkin, and wipe their mouth. Now you are together again in their mind.

Let me explain. Telling someone with a motion that they have something on their face, would only be done by someone who loves the other person. You wouldn't do it to a stranger. This is something husbands and wives do. In her mind, you are together as a loving caring couple from that one simple gesture.