TURN SCARS INTO STARS

Read the life histories of people who have turned a negative into a positive,adversity into advantage,stumbling blocks into stepping stones. They refuse to let disappointment and failures pull them down.

Some of the best music was composed by Beethoven, what was his handicap? He was deaf. Some of the best poetry written on nature was written by Milton. What was his handicap? He was blind. One of the greatest world leaders was US President Franklin D. Roosevelt. What was his handicap? He served from a wheelchair.

CASE STUDIES: The WILMA RUDOLPH Story

Wilma Rudolph was born into a poor home in Tennessee. At age four, she had double pneumonia with scarlet fever, a deadly combination which left her paralyzed with polio. She had to wear a brace and the doctor said she would never put her foot on the earth. But her mother encouraged her; put her foot on the earth; she told Wilma that with God-given ability, persistence and faith she could do anything she wanted. Wilma said, " I want to be the fastest woman on the track on this earth." At the age of nine, against the advice of the doctors, she removed the brace and took the first step the doctors had said she never would. At the age of 13, she entered her first race and came way, way last. And then she entered her second, and third and fourth and came way, way last until a day came when she came in first.

At the age of 15 she went to Tennessee State University where she met a coach by the nature of Ed Temple. She told him, "I want to be the fastest woman on the track on this earth," Temple said,'With your spirit nobody can stop you and besides, I will help you."

The day came when she was at the Olympics and at the Olympics you are matched with the best of the best. Wilma was matched against a woman named Jutta He in who had never been beaten. The first event was the 100-meter race. Wilma beat Jutta He in and won her first gold medal. The third event was the 400-meter relay and she was racing against Jutta one more time. In the relay, the fastest person always runs the last lap and they anchored their teams. The first three people ran and changed the baton easily. When it came to Wilma's turn, she dropped the baton. But Wilma saw Jutta shoot up at the other end;she picked the baton,ran like a machine,beat Jutta a third time and won her third gold medal. It become history: That a paralytic woman became the fastest woman on this earth at the 1960 Olympics.

LESSON OF THE STORY: Successful people do it in spite of, not in absence of, problems.So read stories of people who have turned adversity into opportunity. If we regularly read biographies and auto-bio-graphics of such people, won't we stay motivated? Apply it in your life today you win the race in any adversity.

LEARN INTELLIGENT IGNORANCE

Education teaches us what we can do and also teaches us what we cannot do.

I'm looking for a lot of men with an infinite capacity for not knowing what cannot be done.--Henry Ford

Henry Ford gave this world the V8 engine. He did not have much formal education. In fact, he did not go to school beyond the age of 14. He was intelligent enough to know that a V8 engine would be of great value to his company but he didn't know how to build it. So he asked all his highly educated or qualified people to build one. According to them, a V8 was impossible to build. But Henry Ford insisted on having, his V8. A few months later he asked his people if they had the V8 and they replied, 'We know what can be done and we also know what cannot be done. The V8 is an impossibility." This went on for many months and still Henry Ford said,"I want my V8." And shortly thereafter the same people who said it was impossible produced his V8 engine.

Why? They let their imagination run beyond academic limitation. Education teaches us what can be done and sometimes also teaches us false limitations.

DO SOMETHING FOR OTHERS WHO CANNOT REPAY YOU IN CASH OR KIND

Be a volunteer. It builds self-worth. Helping others as you would expect others to help you gives a feeling of gratification. The process of giving without having expectations or getting anything in return raises ones self-esteem.

LEARN TO GIVE AND RECEIVE COMPLIMENTS

Don't miss out on any opportunity to give sincere compliments. When others give you a compliment, accept it graciously and gracefully with two words, "Thank you." That is sign of humility.

ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY

We need to accept responsibility for our behavior and our actions and insulate ourselves from excuses. Don't be like the student who failed just because he didn't like the teacher on the subject. Who is he hurting the most?We have to accept responsibility and stop blaming others. Then, and only then, will productivity and quality of life improve.

Excuses make the problem worse than the problem itself.

• to self

• to family

• to work

• to society

• to the environment.

PRACTICE DISCIPLINE

Self-discipline does not kill joy but builds it. You see people with talent and ability, and yet they are unsuccessful. They are frustrated and the same behavior pattern affects their business, their health, and their relationships with others. They are dissatisfied and blame it on luck without realizing that many problems are caused by lack of discipline.

SET GOALS

Well-defined goals give a person a sense of direction, a feeling of accomplishment when he reaches his goals. More important than goals is a sense of purpose and vision. They give meaning and fulfillment to life.

What we get upon achieving our goals is a lot less important than what we become. It is the process of becoming that gives us a good feeling. That is what self-esteem is all about.

In goal-setting, we need to be realistic. Unrealistic goals remain unaccomplished, leading to poor self-esteem, whereas realistic goals are encouraging and build high self-esteem.

Associate with People of High Moral Character

Associate yourself with people of good quality if you esteem your reputation, for it is better to be alone than to be in bad company.----George Washington

BECOME INTERNALLY DRIVEN, NOT EXTERNALLY DRIVEN

No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.---Eleanor Roosevelt

There is a story about an ancient Indian sage who was called ugly names by a passerby. The sage listened unperturbed till the man ran out of words. He asked the man,"If an offering is not accepted, who does it belong to?" The man replied, "It belongs to the person who offered it." The sage said, "I refuse to accept your offerings," and walked away, leaving the man dazed. The sage was internally driven.

So long as we blame outside sources, our miseries will continue and we will feel helpless. Unless we accept responsibility for our feelings and behavior, we cannot change. The first step is to ask.

• Why did I get upset?

• Why am I angry?

• Why am I depressed?

Then we getting the clues to overcome them. Happiness is a result of positive self-esteem. If you ask people what makes them happy, you will get all kinds of answers. Most of them would include material things but that is not really true. Happiness comes from being and not having. One can have everything in life and yet not be happy. The reverse is also true.

Develop a Mindset That Brings Happiness

Bitterness is a sign of emotional failure. It paralyzes our capacity to do good. Set your own standards. Be honest to yourself. Compete against yourself. Do the following:

• Look for the positive in every person and in every situation.

• Resolve to be happy.

• Set your own standards judiciously.

• Develop an immunity to negative criticism.

• Learn to find pleasure in every little thing.

• Remember all times are not the same. Ups and downs are part of life.

• Make the best of every situation.

• Keep yourself constructively occupied.

• Help others less fortunate than yourself.

• Learn to get over things. Don't brood.

• Forgive yourself and others. Don't hold guilt or bear grudges.

Give Yourself Positive Auto-suggestions

Develop the habit of giving yourself positive self-talk. Auto-suggestions alter your belief system by influencing your subconscious mind. Your behavior reflects your belief system. Hence, auto-suggestions affect your behavior by influencing your belief system. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Examples:

• I can handle it.

• I can do it.

• I am good at math.

• I have a good memory.

HAVE PATIENCE

Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success.--Brian Adams

In China there is a bamboo tree that is planted, watered and fertilized for the first four years and nothing happens. There is no visible sign of growth. But some time during the fifth year, the bamboo tree grows about 90 feet in six weeks. The question is: Did the bamboo tree grow in six weeks or did it take five years to grow? If the bamboo had not received water and fertilizer during the four years, when there was no visible sign of growth, would the plant had flourished? NO. The bamboo tree would have died. The lesson is clear. Have patience and faith and keep doing the right thing. Even though the results may not be visible, something is happening.

A good beginning makes a good ending.---English Proverb

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